jueves, 23 de noviembre de 2006

ALARMAS



- Pss ¿qué tal todo por ahí?
- Zona asegurada. Sin problema. Creo que vamos a tener menos trabajo hoy que la estatua del parque.
- Ya, pero no quisiera ser yo una estatua para que me caguen todos los pájaros y no poder dar ni siquiera un manotazo para espantarlos.
- Si, debe ser espantoso estar lleno de mierda y no poder hacer nada.
- Nosotras otra cosa no tenemos, pero tenemos un polvoooo
- Que me vas a decir a mí, que tengo todos los circuitos llenos de polvo y de la grasilla esa que suelta el tabaco, un día toso y se me salta un botón.
- No te quejes, que ahora ya no permiten fumar. Están más perseguidos que un conejo en una carrera de galgos.
- Cierto, pero a mí todavía no me han limpiado desde antes de que prohibieran fumar.
- De lo mismo se quejaba una prima mía, que es sirena, de que le echaban mucho polvo.
- ¿Sirena? ¿De esas que tienen el torso desnudo y el resto de cuerpo de pez? Si es de esas no me extraña que tuviera mucho polvo.
- Pero a ti ¿qué te pasa? ¿Se te ha cruzado un cable o qué? Sirena de esas que tienen una luz que gira y hacen ruido como nosotras. Si te oye mi prima que trabaja para la policía te vas a enterar.
- Tranquila, no te sobretensiones que te va a dar un circuito.
- ¡Cuidado! Noto algo.
- No seas alarmista, es un moscón, con una cabeza como un chupachups, pero moscón. Estás estresada, con lo tranquilo que es este trabajo, como sigas así vas a acabar como la alarma de incendios que le saltó el detector cuando los directivos hicieron una orgía, es cierto que la cosa estaba caliente, pero no para tanto. Ahora sí, la escena fue graciocísima porque acabaron todos mojados y en pelotas. Los bomberos se debieron partir de risa.
- Es que a ti nunca te ha entrado un ladrón.
- Ya ¿y qué? pero eso tampoco es motivo para estar así, acabarás como alarma para cuando los niños se hacen pipí. O sea una acuseta de meadas.
- Tienes razón, procuraré relajarme un poco. Quizá suene un poco para ver como corren los guardias y partirme de risa hasta que griten: ¡Falsa alarma! ¡Falsa alarma! Bueno eso si se despiertan y alguno no me confunde con la alarma del reloj o del móvil.
- Eso es, suena suena. Total los muy burros van a pensar después que estará estropeado el infrarrojo, que tenemos poca batería o algo así.
- ¡Allá vamos!

110 Comments:

At noviembre 25, 2006 11:37 a. m., Blogger Gubia said...

Una vez más sorprendete la imaginacion que tienes. Un abrazo y buen fin de semana.

 
At noviembre 25, 2006 9:56 p. m., Blogger Chus said...

Orgía que se van a montar las alarmas :-P
Besiños

 
At noviembre 26, 2006 9:18 p. m., Blogger Cerillo said...

Ahora sé que cuando suenan a horas intempestivas es que quieren juerga

 
At noviembre 27, 2006 3:47 p. m., Blogger Churra said...

Dios mio,necesito una alarma pero ya, ya, ya,.
Donde la pondre?
(secreto)

Besos

 
At noviembre 27, 2006 6:37 p. m., Blogger TICTAC said...

Me habian dicho que las alarmas son escandalosas, pero tan curiosas y mironas no me lo esperaba...interesante, mmm...
voy a esconder una entonces en el congelador, en mi casa todos andan a dieta pero yo consigo siempre mi pote de helado vacio!!! a ver si la alarma ne cuenta que pasa...Le comprare' una bufanda para que no le de' dolor de garganta...

 
At noviembre 27, 2006 8:50 p. m., Blogger ydaledali said...

¿Y por qué tan gritonas? no les debe gustar mucho -o quizas si- ser la acusete del barrio...de hecho por una de ellas el muchacho de la esquina dejó de escabullirse a la casa de la vecina coqueta, pues le dio por sonar escándalosamente haciendo que el marido se devolviera del trabajo a ver que pasaba...

 
At noviembre 27, 2006 9:15 p. m., Blogger BETTINA PERRONI said...

jajaja me gustó eso de no seas alarmista!! con razón ahora entiendo porqué suenan cuando no deben... que chismosas son! jajaja

Zebe, de mis bloggeros consentidos, le mando un fuerte abrazo.

 
At noviembre 28, 2006 3:20 a. m., Blogger Cami said...

ESta muy bueno, NO hay que ser ALRMISTA.

Saludos y un abrazo^.^

 
At noviembre 28, 2006 11:38 a. m., Blogger Alalluna said...

jajaja un moscón con cabeza como un chupachup. jajaja lo que no se puede negar es que tienes una manera muy agradable de contar las cosas. Me has hecho pasar un buen rato leyéndote. Besos

 
At noviembre 28, 2006 2:15 p. m., Anonymous Anónimo said...

De verdad.. que si las cosas hablaran.. como las paredes la jartá cosas que dirian..

jejeje

Besos.

 
At noviembre 29, 2006 2:01 p. m., Blogger Isthar said...

No sabía que las alarmas tenían tan mala baba. Debe ser que la continua espera de algo contra lo que alertar las tiene con los cables en tensión y cara de pocos amigos :P

La verdad es que yo aparte de la del móvil que uso como despertador... ninguna más.

 
At noviembre 30, 2006 11:49 a. m., Anonymous Anónimo said...

Rilke fixo Poemas-obxectos. Ti fas post-obxectos. Parabéns

 
At noviembre 30, 2006 3:02 p. m., Blogger Vivo soñando said...

Pero Zebedeo, me puedes decir cómo creen tus alarmas que se le puede echar "un polvo" a una sirena?. ¿por donde? si tiene cola de pez....... Tienes que saber que yo en mi anterior vida fui sirena.

 
At noviembre 30, 2006 5:17 p. m., Blogger Enrique Gallud Jardiel said...

Estupendo.

 
At diciembre 04, 2006 4:48 p. m., Blogger sb said...

;) pobrecillas, tienen un trabajo horrible, sólo nos acordamos de ellas cuando fracasan ...

 
At diciembre 04, 2006 5:35 p. m., Blogger JeJo said...

- ... " Y aquellas viejas campanas que alertaban en épocas remotas,
abuelas de sirenas y de alarmas, yacen olvidadas, convertidas en tristes onanistas de bronce." ...

(un toque poético nunca viene mal)

Saludos ...

 
At diciembre 04, 2006 6:18 p. m., Blogger gaia56 said...

pues a mi tu escrito me llevó a otro tipo de alarmas... más personales.
Me divertí mucho leyendo.

 
At diciembre 18, 2006 10:05 p. m., Blogger Fuego Fatuo said...

Muy bueno lo de la orgía de directivos... cuidadito ahora que se aproximan las cenas de empresa por navidad, esas en las que siempre aparecen fotos comprometidas y aparte de encenderse algún que otro piloto, también se corre la alarma de posibles despidos ;)

 
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